She is the Healing
by Hearts1989
Summary: This is the prompt for Bethyl week day 3. Beth is Daryl's light at the end of the tunnel, a tiny glimmer of light in the dark world of wandering corpses. She is the sunlight to the darkness. She is the healing for his pain. A Bethyl one shot. Happy Bethyl week!


**Prompt from "She is the Sunlight" by Trading Yesterday **

**As Usual I own nothing, absolutely nothing except the Bethyl craziness that exists in my head. I will glad own that. ;) **

_**She is the Healing**_

"And if loving her is

Is heartache for me

If holding her means

I have to bleed

Then I am the martyr

Love is to blame

Cause she is the healing

And I am the pain"

Daryl couldn't believe he was following these numbnut assholes all over backwoods Georgia. When Joe and his guys had found him, he was about at the lowest point he'd ever been and that included all the times his old man had beat the shit out of him. He figured after running all night chasing that car with the white cross on the back. The glow of those taillights would forever be imprinted in the back of his mind. He saw them at every turn. He blindly followed along, feeling about as numb as if he had fallen into the creek in mid February. He felt like she had been gone for forever instead of just the four days it had been. He saw her face everywhere he went. He could still smell the sweet smell of strawberries in her hair. Every time they passed a wheat field, the tall weeds swaying in the wind, their flaxen color a stark contrast against the bright blue of the Georgia fall sky, he was reminded of her hair the way it looked when she was trying to tame it back into the ponytail she seemed to favor.

When she was taken from him, they may as well have ripped his heart from his chest and placed it on the seat beside her. Instead he was left with this aching, crushing weight in his chest where his heart just lay there. He was hollow, empty, a shell of what he even was before he met her. And he hadn't been much of a man then.

Those days with Beth had been the happiest of his entire life, those days after the governor came and took the small haven they managed to carve out of a world gone to shit; like carving out the rotten pieces of a potato and salvaging what remained. After the governor and his men came and attacked, there was nothing left to save. Daryl worried most of all that there was nothing left of him to save now. Nothing left but this brittle, broken piece of the man he used to be, was supposed to be, he wasn't sure which.

He missed her. Hell, yes he missed her. She had said it.

"You're going to miss me so bad when I'm gone Daryl Dixon."

Her words haunted his every waking moment and ghosted into his brain at night when he managed to sleep at all. It was a mantra; she's gone, she's gone, she's just gone. That was what he told himself. If he allowed his brain to go the other way and think of her dead, lifeless eyes staring back up at the world that had treated her so badly when she was nothing but all the good and pure the world had left to offer. She had been the sunlight in a land thrust back into the dark ages. Her smile could warm the coldest heart. Her gaze could make a man feel like he was going to burn up from the inside out; just incinerate beneath the smoldering baby blues. He knew he loved her. He knew it. He wanted to tell her but he hadn't been able to figure out how and now it was too late. He figured this was his punishment for not taking the chance with her when he could have. Now he would never know. He would never hold her again.

He was grateful for the hurt losing her had caused. Because if he didn't feel the hurt, he would just be stuck in the haze of numb and that was a dangerous place to be in this world. He was thankful that if loving her meant he had to bleed, it was okay. He was okay with being a martyr, for her, he'd cross a thousand oceans. If loving her meant he had to walk across a bed of nails, he'd gladly remove his boots and tread barefoot. And if she was on the other side of any of those barriers, it would be worth it. He'd do anything to see her again.

Now as they trudged along the same train tracks down the line from where they had found him, he was walking ahead of Joe's group in the dark of night. He looked ahead to see a dark sedan rounding the corner, turning down the road away from them. When he saw the white cross in the back window, he didn't think, just started running, chasing the car. He didn't hear Joe's guys behind him and he didn't glance back to see if they were following. The most important thing was following that car. He was going to find her this time. She was not going to be lost from him forever. She just couldn't be. His heart was pounding fast and he yelled for her, "Beth!" just like he had the other night exactly like this one.

He heard his voice inside his mind and woke up in a sweat, Beth's body pressed close to his, curled into his side. He worked at steadying his breathing and sat up, looking to see if he had been yelling in his sleep. He knew he had been prone to that when she was gone. Maggie and Rick had woken him up gently on more than one occasion lest he bring a whole herd of walkers down on the camp. He pulled her closer to him and rested his arm over her middle, careful not to wake her.

He was thankful to whoever was in charge upstairs nowadays, that he was not back in that place anymore without her. He was not with Joe and his guys. He wasn't at Terminus with all the horrible shit that had gone down there. He was not on the road with everyone after they had left there. He was with Beth, _his_ Beth. He thought back over all those weeks without her.

Whatever pain he had felt in losing her, he had learned from it. He'd never take her presence for granted again. She was the cure to his aching heart, his bruised soul. If he was the pain, then she was surely the healing because he didn't hurt anymore. Not since he had seen her across that field of felled walkers.

In that moment, once he realized she was not just his daydream or his addled brain playing a horrible trick of the mind, the pain was instantly diminished. Not the blinding numb, but the good kind of painkiller. Just the love he felt for her and the love he now knew she felt for him. Their love was strong enough anesthesia for anything this fucking world had to throw at him. As long as Beth was by his side, he knew he had the fortitude to do whatever it took. As long as he drew breath, Beth would always be with him. He'd never let anything happen to her; not ever again because he never wanted to feel that helpless and hopeless again. She was the one bright spot in this world. She was the sunlight and he didn't care of he went blind, he'd be happy to reside in her brilliance until the end of time.

He leaned over and kissed the top of her head, whispering in the hush of the night, "I love you." The sweetest sigh slipped from between her lips and as he watched her chest rise and fall, he knew he was lost in this love forever. And he was okay with that.

**Okay, guys, there's my prompt for the day. Sorry it's not as long as my stuff usually is. I've had a particularly sucky da****y. Had to have an injection in my neck today for some tingling and numbness and pain and ever since the anesthesia wore off, I've been in a fair amount of pain despite painkillers that are making me quite loopy. But here it is for what it's worth. I chose "She is the Sunlight" prompt and was able to work in the numb prompt as well just because I was lucky enough that it fit! **** I had originally planned on working on Vanilla Fields again tonight but I don't know if I'm going to feel like it. I might get to write more for it tomorrow but definitely, definitely Friday. I don't know about you guys, but this Bethyl week has been so fun! I am truly enjoying it. Thanks so much for all the follows, favorites and reviews. You guys are the best and I love you all. Sometime soon, hopefully tonight, I will get around to replying individually to reviews! Until next time, fellow Bethylers, xoxoxoxoxo**


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